3.18.2008

my MPD

Lately i've been thinking about Multiple Personality Disorder (MPD) and wondering if that might explain some things. i mean, the idea that i could potentially be acting a certain way and not remembering it is totally feesible. The relationship i have with my cats is borderline MPD as it is. and i recall a time when my sister and i weren't totally sure we weren't the same person. Like maybe her moving to hawaii is actually just the fading out of my KT personality and now she's coming back for a visit. which is very exciting. and perhaps some new personalities have come into the picture.

Sometimes i think that maybe everything that goes on in the world is just a product of my MPD and i'm not really me, but i'm everyone. And you're everyone, so we're the same person, but you're just another wrinkle in my brain. catch my drift?

i'm lost

i feel like any part of me that was every even remotely creative has been destroyed by inhibitions, worry and inability to sleep.
i like to think that at one point in time i was creative even if just a little. but now i question whether or not i actually was or it was just a trick.
Now it feels like it's much easier to be unimpressive.
i envy your artistic abilities, i always have.
this feeling makes me want to quit my job and move back in with my parents.
i'm tired of being an adult. time to be a kid again.