what is your porpoise in life?

i was cleaning out boxes of stuff in my closet last night. i found many treasures. (mixed tapes, doodles from conventions past, photos of forever ago, old year books)
tonight i will move furniture and go through more stuff. i have a whole heaping pile of stuff to go to the thirft store.

also our tv died of what seems like natural causes on sunday. it wasn't old age, cause it wasn't that old. but regardless we're in the market for a new tv now... if i had a 40oz. i'd pour a little out for the tv. but i'm at work and don't. maybe i'll pour out some of my water.


Today is comparitively better than the last. i woke up late, this is usually not a good start. housesitting has taken a toll on my sanity. but its nice out and its friday.
yesterday when my hair band broke i compared it to my life. a useless piece of rubber covered in cloth. broken and no longer serves its original purpose. but i tied it back together and it works just the same. that's how today is. not perfect but back to status quo with a few new knots.


somebody tried to sell me fine art at a wholesale price today. I told him no i'm not interested. and he said "well do you know anyone who likes music?" i mumbled something a long the lines of "uhhhh....." and he pulls out this "Matted and Framed!" picture of a guy playing a piano... how ridiculous is that? what a scam...

i realized that i'm depressed because while i could be doing fun things on the weekends i'm sleeping instead. that depresses me. which makes me sleep more... i need someone to go to the park with on saturday and sunday afternoons. anyone? anyone?


Be not ashamed of mistakes and thus make them crimes.

Does confusion have anything to do with Confucius?
Confucius was a Chinese thinker and social philosopher. His philosophy emphasized personal and governmental morality, correctness of social relationships, justice and sincerity. Confucius' thoughts have been developed into a system of philosophy known as Confucianism.
Or is it just confusionism?

I’m missing certain parts of my world, maybe not the ones you'd expect. You should know who you are. And I’d like to see you soon.

The cat slept with me last night. It made me sleep easier. No nightmares. Though also, the Nyquil slept with me too.. Which means, no coughing and easier sleep too.

I need an idea for a production... anyone got one?
My appendages won’t stay warm.


there'll be no more dinner bells left for you to ring

today i'm my own boss. i was left alone. and i'm happy.
when did i become this person? i'm in pain all day.
but i'm smiling. Nothing is changing how i feel inside.
i need to be squeezed. i'll never admit that.
Today is my day. Thursday is now declared Natalieday. unofficially.
home seems closer today than most other days.
monday i could've died. tuesday i felt like hell. wednesday i ate a steak with my closest. thursday i'm my own boss.

Looking forward to the summer. Hopefully summer will be filled with these days, days where i can be smiling and free. Anyone want to join my Natalieday revolution?